What to Do When You Are NOT Special

When I grew up people started telling me that I am not special. Or maybe it was just me who started to buy into this myth.

I found myself in a job I didn’t like. Doing work for someone who was not following my ideals and values. And I didn’t know what to do to change it.

My individually got buried in a dead-end job. By being only a small cog in the machine. And I didn’t even like the machine. Neither did I enjoy being a “cog”.

People love to tell you that there can only be very few super villains. But they have a lot of minions. Just like in that movie “Despicable Me (2010)”. You can be one of these little creatures.

I feel like a minion a lot. 

But then again: What do you remember when you think of this movie?

People love these “useless” little creatures. Even though they are not special at all. They love them so much the creators of the movie even had to give them their own one in 2015.

So maybe this means that even if you are NOT special. If you make a lot of noise in the world. And enough people begin to like you. That eventually you will get your own movie. 

There is hope that eventually I will become more than a simple “cog”.

Yes!

So what do you do now?

When you realize that you are not special at all?

REFLECT

Ask yourself why you think that way. Are you comparing yourself to someone and then feel like you lack skills and individuality? Could be. I love to do that a lot.

The problem is that media loves to cloud our minds. They present us images of photoshopped models and overnight success stories. They show us the 0.01% of the top. And make us believe that we INDEED can be just as successful like them. Everyone of us.

But they don’t tell us how.

And then we feel like crap. Because we are clueless. And frustrated. And we desperately try to find ways to get there as well.

Because society sells us the idea that if you buy Wonderstruck by Taylor Swift you will eventually smell like her. And be a little bit like her. And feel a little bit like her?

We believe all that bullshit. And it robs us of our individuality.

It makes us feel less special.

Don’t buy into that stuff.

THINK BACK

I believe kids do a lot of stuff right. They just follow their emotions. Or better said, they listen to them. As you grow older you shut them out more because there are “more important things to do”.

You have to realize that whenever we don’t feel special. Lacking fundamental and individual skills. We forgot what makes us special in the first place.

Kids know that. But they don’t call it “being special”. They just behave like they naturally behave. 

When I was a little boy I enjoyed learning and reading. I learned every “useless” information I could get my hands on.

  • I drove around my little town with my new bike and learned and remembered every street there was. Every day I discovered a new corner and learned a couple of new street names.
  • I memorized all the cheats of my favourite Game Boy games and recalled them proudly in front of my friends at school.
  • I learned all major cities in Austria and their associated license plate tags.
  • I once borrowed a lexicon from our local library and tried to remember all the words in there. And then I beat myself up about it because I only reached the letter “S” and couldn’t finish it in one week. And my parents had to pay 5 Schilling (roughly 40 cent) to extend it for another week.

I was weird like that.

There was no purpose in doing all this though. But I enjoyed the process of it. And then you grow up and realize that this “process” does not help you in the real world.

At least that’s what they are trying to tell you.

How would you make money off of being crazily addicted to “learning new things”?

(Yeah, like being adaptive and curious about finding out new ways of doing things is worth spending your energy and time into lol… how dumb of me!)

“That’s not a real job.”

“You can’t make money with that.”

“Put your time into something useful.”

And then soon you start to adapt.

And with these changes also your fulfilment and happiness decreases.

Because you did something you enjoyed when you were carefree.

But now stopped because you were told that “that is not a real thing”.

TAKE MONEY OUT OF THE EQUATION

“What would you do you had one million dollar?”, I asked all of my co-workers one day I was depressed at work and tried to waste a couple of minutes of my work day.

“I would do the same I am doing now. Making computer games. But better ones. Games I would really enjoy myself as well.”, said one of them.

(Sad story actually when you are working in a company making computer games, and you know that you would NEVER play these games if you would not get paid to do so… but then again, isn’t it even more sad when you are working in the same field and don’t even like the industry at all? Aw screw me!)

“I would work on my own projects. And spend more time on them. These are the things I really enjoy doing.”, said another one.

Whatever it is you would be doing.

You could be doing it already. When you don’t have money. You usually have a lot of time. And if you use this time to do what you enjoy doing. Money eventually comes naturally.

Or not. But it doesn’t matter. Because you enjoyed doing it, right?

And time you enjoyed “wasting” wasn’t wasted time.

TRY A LOT OF THINGS

Let’s be real here. A lot of people out there are very lucky.

They found something they like. And they were pretty young when they found it. So all they had to do was keep doing the things they enjoyed and become even better at it. Which is pretty easy because you love what you do.

But others are a bit unlucky. Or actually pretty darn unlucky. They might have wasted a lot of time trying to FIGURE OUT what they might enjoy doing. And sadly they still not have found it.

I am still trying to find out what I am naturally good at. Every day I try new things in order to eventually make it. Someday I will know what I can do best. I believe.

So when you now think that you are not special. Try something totally different. Try something new. Maybe you are one of these poor unlucky guys who has not yet found his true calling.

Could be.

Try a lot of things. Something will eventually stick.

And suddenly you get your own blockbuster movie.

Which is your life.

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