It's difficult to listen to your heart when your mind is bombarding you with all kinds of excuses why that is utterly stupid.
Repeat this bullshit long enough and the most innocent child will start to believe that there is something wrong with him or her.
What if you finally get over all your SHOULDs and MUSTs that made your life miserable for such a long time. What if you dropped the baggage for good now? What if you finally broke free?
There was no sense in "pushing myself" to keep going. I was chasing a wild and unrealistic dream. And sometimes we have to be realistic instead and simply give up.
They control every piece of your life and therefore are the main reason you are where you are right now.