“You have to be setting BIG GOALS for yourself!”, they say.
But why is that?
Who says that? What if I have VERY TINY goals? What if I am aiming for very little in life? And I am actually fine with that.
Society, social conditioning, the internet, books, “people”. Whoever “they” are. They try to put THEIR needs onto yourself. But who actually wants that? No wonder short-time pleasure can’t truly fulfil you. It’s like you are living your life to match someone else’s expectations?
Society loves to tell you what is good for you. It loves to dictate your desires and control your cravings. But society is selfish too. It wants you to consume. It overrules your free will. And you end up being confused. You forget about what YOU want out of life. You lose your freedom. And then you pay the price.
But we have to make ourselves remember… everyday I have to remember what I truly want out of life. And then I figure out that my desires are fairly simple.
I only have three goals in my life:
A) I want to be happy.
B) I want to eliminate drama out of my life.
C) I want everyday to be as smooth as possible.
Sounds simple, right? But if it were as simple as it sounds everyone would be fucking happy.
In reality it’s a little bit harder.
Bad things happen too.
I lose my job and run out of money. I have no clue on how to pay my next rent. My girlfriend leaves me. I feel alone in a world of billions of people (how is THAT even possible?). I hurt myself. I cry. And grow depressed.
And suddenly your life is out of order. And a complete mess. What now?
I was reading the “Magic of Reality” by Richard Dawkins. In it there is a chapter about “why bad things happen”. I was curious and skipped forward. I wanted to know. “It’s so unfair. What did I do to deserve all this? What did I do wrong?!” I read the chapter. And then I was disappointed. He wrote: “Bad things happen. Because things happen.”
But I guess I understand where he is going with that.
Bad things happen because things happen. So basically there is a equal chance for good and bad things to happen. But the problem is we don’t WANT “bad things” to happen. Remember? We want to be happy and want everyday to be as smooth as possible. No hassle. At least I do.
So when bad things ruin your day, it feels awful. It just has a bigger influence on your mood than someone reaching out to you and giving you a sincere “thank you”. Or a hug. Or kisses you. Or says “I love you”. And means it. But then again: if that’s the case, could it be that you focus on the wrong things? Hmm…
Oftentimes we are so focused on all the people “who are out there to get you” that we forget to focus on the good stuff again. The little awesome things that happen in-between.
The little things that brighten your mood.
The little goals.
Like being happy.