Change Is Painful And Most People Will Fail

It is easy to live an average life.

You can drift through your day with no expectations and accept whatever may happen to you. It is easy and comfortable, but only as long as you don’t mind having no control over your life.

If you are somehow like me, this might bug you though.

When you try to shape your life depending on your own will, you have to put in some energy and efforts. And until life adapts itself to your will, it might cause you some pain (probably more than you want it too).

It simply takes some time until your life changes the way you want it to be. Some people believe that life tests you how bad you really want it. I don’t believe that.

I furthermore believe that you have to “undo” all the stuff you have been doing wrong till then. And depending on how far you have been going in the wrong direction the longer it might take you to come back.

If you are in your mid twenties you invested like 20+ years into something you think you are. Now (out of whatever reason) you try to become MORE (whatever you define more to be). My theory is that in order to get more you have to undo the habits you created for yourself in this last 20+ years.

You have to unravel your convictions, your ideas of what is possible, raise your standards, remove your limiting beliefs, find motivation to keep doing what you do although life will give you no signs of improvement. You have to commit to pain (because change always involves pain), face additional troubles with your personal relationships, friends and family (because they might disagree with or just don’t like that you having less time for them now because you follow other passions).

You have to learn that you are nothing like you think you are (and this might freak you out), realise that the idea of yourself you had in your head is bullshit and not really true, struggling with the fact that you don’t know at all what you are (because probably what you think you are is not what you are).

I believe that this is where most of the people fail. 

They try something new but feel disappointed because they don’t see any instant result. It is pathetic to me. It is like you have been walking around for years on your feet and now you decide to walk around on your hands but yet feel disappointed because you cannot do it perfectly after one week (although deciding to walk on your hands from now on might be pathetic in itself but who am I judge lol).

It is like some people do not see the bigger picture and do not respect the processes. 

I believe it is somehow related to them comparing themselves to other people who are already at their peak and then feel disappointed because they look at themselves.

But you don’t have to. Just follow your new path, raise your standards, try to see the fun in the process and enjoy as much as possible. Embrace the pain you feel, because you know that all the pain is just you transforming into something new.

Like a butterfly you have to go through metamorphosis first.

You have to go through the fire.

You have to let go of your “I am a caterpillar and I just crawl around and eat stuff” story to become the beautiful and winged butterfly you are set out to become.


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  • Mr Midnight and Sir Winston say that there are some very wise human quotes on your blog. Your blog is very much appreciated. Thank you for posting. Best regards from the blog of Mr Midnight, Sir Winston and myself. :)

  • Thanks, happy you liked it!

  • Patricia

    True! Just like the grape vines. There is a regular pruning and maintenance throughout the growing season to keep them manageable and productive.I compare this pruning when I need to change or remove something in my life. Although i know I will be in so much pain, I am thinking that I will more productive and have a sweeter life in the end.

  • Thomas Mondel

    Thats a funny comparison, but I like it! Thanks for sharing and stopping by!