“In one year from now, you will feel like you wasted your time even thinking about this crap!” Could be. But I could also find myself in a place in which I desperately try to bury myself under my own self-pity and overwhelming sadness. Yet, at some point, there will be no more “one year” ahead of me anyways, and then it’s all over nonetheless. Still, why should I have to wait for one more long...
A long time ago I did someone a huge favor and really hoped they would return it in one way or the other at a later point in my life.
But of course, they never did...
And because I deep down expected them to, I got super pissed at them when they didn't as they clearly betrayed me and merely used me for my generous help, time and effort.
Sometimes it’s important to not take shit too personally. There will always be people out there who will dump their own insecurities and bullshit on top of you. There will always be chaos which disrupts your order. And then you might feel the urge to curse the world for all the hardship that befell you. But isn’t it true that life is suffering nonetheless? Haven’t all the major...
Sometimes I sit in the hotel at breakfast and look at all those people wondering what the most fucked-up thing in their life may be right now.
Why don't we talk about so many things which are fundamentally important? Why is there this stupid and ridiculous trend of being politically correct? And how can you still have an open discussion about important topics when you always have to be scared about offending someone and then (legally) get punished for it?
“Come on, you are not depressed, please stop bitching around,” he said to me. At some point in your life, nobody cares about your issues anymore. At some point, you reach adulthood, and you are supposed to take care of your life on your own. And if you don't - for whatever reason - you should man up and fix it already.
For years, I simply couldn‘t make myself feel good enough about myself. This nagging voice inside my head just wouldn't let me sleep at night. Everyday I was so focused on how others would perceive me, I shapeshifted myself into all kinds of weird things depending on who I was talking to at any given moment. It’s an exhausting (and completely retarded) defense mechanism which, so far, got me...
Sometimes we hope for someone else to help us out, and we forget that we could also be this person for ourselves as well. If there is nobody around, oftentimes, we have to be our very own somebody instead.
I got a lot of backlash for my latest blog post when I talked trash about my father. One guy said "only the sick hate their benefactors." And maybe he is right: maybe I am sick. But what if a simple "fuck you dad" finally allows you to embrace even your darkest and most unlovable sides and (maybe even for the first time) let you experience a fullness and depth of life you never had felt before.
Today, I feel like breaking the silence and telling you how much I hate you.
It was the shortest date I ever had. I invited a girl over to my apartment, but already 10 minutes in, I weirded her out. I told her that, to me nothing really matters. But I said it in some cocky look at how cool I am kind of way. I tried to come across super laid-back, when in reality, all I wanted was to make her like me. And that's why I fucked up.
"I'll be a millionaire by the age of 35! I'll proof them all wrong!" But why? Who? And what for? I am obsessed with this financial goal. In my head it's the solution to all my problems. Like an idiot, I am willing to sacrifice my now, in hopes for something that I assume will fix my future. But who tells me that the future will save me? Because most of the times it won't. Not only do I give all...